Getting Happy

Ever have those times when it's really hard to focus on the good things, even when they outnumber the bad?

I went through the shock of my life last month. Within a week I had found out my roommate was unexpectedly moving back to the States, that I was losing my job of two years and because of that I would have to make an unexpected trip out of the country and most likely two, along with not knowing when I would get my next paycheck.

Since then, I got a new job and started the visa process. I won't start work until Oct. 3, but I have enough resources to last me until then. Also, I discovered there is a 30-day tourist extension that I applied for so that hopefully I only have to make one trip out of the country. And my ex contacted me and we had plans to meet up. The following week I found a replacement roommate and everything was looking great.

Then this week, the roommate backed out and I now have two weeks to find a new one before rent is due. Rent that I can't afford on my own. My current roommate still hasn't given me her half of last month's rent and because of that, I can't pay my US loans until she gives me the money.

Also, things kind of fell apart and I've yet to meet with my ex and haven't heard from him since last week. Things were going great and I thought maybe we would talk about giving things another try. But now I'm not so sure.

So, two bad things out of a whole bunch of good things and I'm stuck in a rut. I'm trying to focus on the good and trust that things will work themselves out. But honestly, it's kind of hard. I spent a good two weeks walking around in a dream-like state. Shooting 'thank you's up to heaven every five minutes because I couldn't believe how pretty much all my problems solved themselves within that time. And now I'm frantically praying that a new roommate will surface soon. And that, I don't know, something will happen with my ex. Either I finally learn my lesson and move on or that we get together and talk things over. I don't know.

Ugh... could use some good news right about now...

80s Extravaganza

I'm beginning to feel like I go to Ireland in Itaewon a bit too much. But kind of hard not to when your friends are hosting parties there every weekend. And I feel like all the bartenders are my adorable little brothers (except Dio... funny big brother, maybe?)

Anywho, the latest in the round of parties was Jack's 30th birthday party. We all pitched in and helped plan it. Dio and I contributed the theme- the 80s. And he got all the bartenders to dress up while I tried to get all the guests to dress up. There were only a handful of us, so I guess I failed. But we still had a good time. And Jack was beyond thrilled with how everything turned out. We made a video for him and Dio came up with an ingenious way to do the cocktail show. I won't put it up here, because it was really gross...

On to the highlight pictures...

Our awesome outfits.

The birthday boy in the middle.

Hannah, the amazing girlfriend who planned the whole thing.

A Club, A Bar, and Two Korean Celebrities

So, in the last week I have met not only one, but TWO Korean celebrities. Oh yea. And it only took me almost four years of living here to randomly bump into them.

On Friday night, I went out with the boys to Hongdae. I was originally going to stay home, but I figured, eh, why not? We headed over to our favorite club (because it's cheap) but were unpleasantly surprised to find out that it wasn't cheap that night. (25,000 won vs 10,000 won) But we go in anyway, and discover that it's because Supreme Team, a very popular Korean hip-hop duo, is performing. I had already gotten a picture with them last month at Greenplugged Festival, so I sat back at the bar with my friend Fahad, while everyone else crowded up to the stage to get a better look.

SSam D, Me, E-sens

Well, after their performance, I noticed that the guys, E-sens and SSamD, were in a VIP room behind us. So, Fahad and I spent a very entertaining 20 minutes watching all these girls trying to dance very sexy-like in front of the opening to the room (no door and it was kind of glassed in), in the hopes that they would get invited in to drink with the guys. Or, at least, we assume that's why a bunch of them were dancing there. But of course, none of them did.

After awhile, we go back to drinking and dancing and whatnot, when I look behind me and notice that E-sens is now standing right behind us talking to a big foreign guy and his Korean girlfriend. At that moment, I decide that I want another picture. I wait for a very long time, since it's E-sens, you know. Every time he would stop talking to one person, another would jump up and demand a picture or tell him he's wonderful. So I gave up. But then my friend Jee notices that he's talking to one of the rappers. So I hand him my camera and walk up to them to ask for a picture.

E-sens, Me, B-Free

What I get instead is E-sens putting his arm around me and saying,"This guy is the hottest rapper here!" To which his friend responds, "Don't listen to anything he says." I explain what was said to which I get, "He's E-sens! He's the hottest!" This goes back and forth for awhile. Then Jee comes up and waves the camera. We take the picture. And then, both just hang out and talk to us for a bit. Jee talked to E-sens for a long time and I tried to listen in, but it was loud. So I end up dancing for a bit. And then E-sens danced with us for a bit. And then I hear, "Wait! You work at Arirang!" Now, it was loud in this club. So you can imagine how loud he shouted to get my attention.

It's the first rapper friend. His name is B-Free. He really wants to get on Arirang. I told him I'm on the news team, I have nothing to do with any of the other programs, but I could ask around and see what I could do. We exchange numbers and Facebook info. And we're still texting. Planning to go to his show in July. And hopefully before that, we can all get together and hang out again. ^_^



So that was Friday night... Now, here's what happened last night...

I went to my friend's bar with a group of people in Itaewon. They all left before I did, but I had a bit of my drink left to finish, so I stayed a bit longer. A small group of army guys came in. I started talking to one. And he seemed nice. But then he got a little weird. And apparently his buddies were making a group of Korean girls uncomfortable. So Dio asked me to translate for him and tell these guys that the girls were uncomfortable. (I'm not sure why, his English is good enough...)

Anywho, then Dio leans over and tells me, "By the way, it's Yoon Eun-hye." As in Coffee Prince and Goong Yoon Eun-hye. As in these losers were hitting on an insanely popular actress and didn't even know it.

My eyes go wide and immediately Dio said, "No."

"But I just want to say hi!"

"No."

So for 20 minutes I sit on my stool and sneak glances over at her when she's not paying attention. Felt like a total creeper. I then come up with what I, in my slight inebriated state, thought was a perfect plan. I gather up my purse and say bye to the bartenders. Their table was right by the doorway. So, I go up to say good-bye to the bartender at their table, then turn and say, "Oh! You're Yoon Eun-hye? I really liked Coffee Prince!" in Korean. She shakes my hand. And then I hear, "Emma!!" from the entrance. Yea, Dio caught me. So I bowed very quickly and rushed out because I thought I was in trouble.

Turns out I wasn't. He was laughing at me and asked if I got a picture. I didn't. He said next time maybe. If I don't die from my extreme embarrassment from running away from Yoon Eun-hye first, that is.

When Will You Go Back to USA?

I get asked this question a lot. And the honest answer is, I don't know. The longer I stay in Korea, more I want to keep staying here. It has nothing to do with not liking the US. It's my home and eventually I want to go back there, but right now, I just have no desire to make that move.

My life is in Korea. My friends are here. My job is here. My livelihood is here. Being here inspires me as a writer and I've had some awesome opportunities that I wouldn't have gotten in the States. If I left, it would feel like I'm leaving my family. And it would be hard.

Also, I don't have a whole lot in common with my friends from the US anymore. We're all at different points in our lives. Some are getting married. Some are having kids. Some are engaged or climbing up the career ladder. Or still somewhere around the bottom. I wouldn't know what to talk about with most of them. And I don't think a lot of them would understand me or my mindset now. I'm one of a few out of my friend groups from both high school and college that has spent a considerable amount of time living outside the US. It changes you as a person. It changes the way you think. The way you live life. The way you view certain things. And unless another person has gone through a similar experience, it's hard to relate on certain levels.

I'm not the same person I was when I left the US. I still have my values, but I've had new experiences that a lot of my friends haven't. Some don't talk to me anymore because they don't agree with some of the decisions I've made. But that's fine, I suppose. The life I live is not meant for everyone and I personally don't regret anything I've done, good or bad. And everything is something that I've needed to go through to become the person that I am today.

Though, sometimes I wonder if I stay here because it's easy. If I go back to the States, I have to start over at a new job (if I can find one) and basically with a whole new life. I'll have to find a new group of friends that are my age and single, because let's face, it's hard for us single girls to want to hang out with our married friends all the time. Because our interests are different and different things take priority in our lives.

I wouldn't mind staying here long-term. As long as I can get back to visit my family at least once a year. And I'm open to the idea of potentially getting married here, if that's how it's meant to be. Though, I do believe that my one condition is that whoever I marry is open to the idea of moving back to the States when we have children. But again, this is all hypothetical at this point.

So, in short, when will I go back to the US? I don't know...

Home

I love my family and I love my state (Oklahoma) but sometimes, I'm a little embarrassed to say I grew up there. Mostly when I see something ignorant or idiotic written on Facebook or somewhere else on the internet without any facts to back it up. Most of this time it's political statements or racist statements or sexist statements. I wrote something on Tumblr not too long ago about how not all southerners were rednecks... well, some of them do fine the profile.

I was sifting through the "Yay Osama is dead!" and "Praise the Lords" in my Facebook newsfeed the other day when I came across this:

Is it at all ironic that oSama is one letter off from oBama? I’m not slammin’ our pres. b/c I don’t believe that’s right and I pray for the guy to make Godly decisions. But I’m just sayin………coincidence?

It was written by a girl I went to high school with. We're the same age, but she's a stay-at-home mom with two kids, one of which is just a couple months old. I don't think she finished college but I'm not even sure if she went. I do know that she still lives in the little town where we're from and she's prone to make a lot of status messages with "God" in them.

None of these things should matter. But when you're from Oklahoma, they create the stereotype. Uneducated, lives in the country, barefoot and pregnant, conservative, overtly religious. They are the traits of the group where I'm from that ends up being the loudest voice. And they drown out all the reasonable, rational, educated folks. Like my parents. Who never take cheap shots at Obama, even though they don't like him. They may badmouth his corporate bailouts and healthcare reforms, but they do their research and know their stuff. They, for one, do not want to be labelled "hicks" or "rednecks" during a debate or discussion, so they make sure they can back up all their arguments.

Why can't the people like that be what Oklahoma is known for? Not the high teen pregnancy rate (still haven't learned that ONLY teaching abstinence doesn't work), or the high drop out rate, or the low test scores or the trailer parks? Or the white trash? Or the birthers? Or the Christian extremists?

Don't get me wrong, I am Oklahoman... but I'm not that kind of Oklahoman.

Confessions of a Lazy English Teacher

Before I came to Korea to teach English three years ago, I was a very hard worker. My parents always taught me that if I want something, I have to work for it, so I did. In college, I never worked less than two jobs and at one point I think I had about four so I could pay for all my bills and have money left over to eat and do fun stuff on the weekend (when I wasn't working). Also, some of the work was scholarship based. My parents cut me off at age 18 (though they did chip in for college by taking out a loan) so I had to pay for my car loan, gas, phone bill, etc. Fortunately, I lived on campus, so at least I didn't have to worry about rent or utilities for awhile. But even during the summer, I would work a part-time job and do internships so I could go out and do things plus save up. (Mom and Dad said I should always have a savings account.)

Right after I graduated, I worked as a daily newspaper reporter. Again, I worked hard and would often end up being the last reporter to leave the office. It was my first "real" job out of college and I wanted to do it right (meaning, I was terrified of screwing up and getting fired).

Then, I decided to come to Korea for a year to teach English.

I mostly did it so I would have the experience of living in a foreign country. And because I've always wanted to live abroad and learn about other cultures and languages. Just traveling there would never do it for me. I had to live there. But I didn't see many opportunities to do that as a reporter.

At first, I worked very hard. I taught adults, so there was no BS-ing my way through a lesson. But, my institute provided us with teaching manuals that outlined every lesson for us. So, after a few months of teaching, I no longer needed to prep before my classes. I could basically walk into the office about five minutes before my first class started in the morning and be able to successfully teach a two to three unit class. (1 unit = 45 minutes)

And then I would teach one on one classes, and all they would want to do is talk to me. Not to mention, for the first time in my short life, one job was enough. There were a couple months when I would work long hours (teaching about 13 hours a day) but to me, the work was easy and didn't require a whole lot of effort on my part. So I quit putting in tons of effort. And then I got bored. Because it wasn't what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, just for a short period. It was the first time I had a job that I didn't really care about and could get away with not trying my hardest. That said, I was professional. I showed up on time, dress professionally. I wasn't one of those teachers that would go out every night until 3 am (couldn't when I started work at 6:45 am) or come in drunk or hungover. But I didn't try as hard as I could have. I basically just coasted by.

Needless to say, I switched. I left English teaching after about a year and moved on to what I thought would be the challenging world of Korean PR. It was and wasn't. Trying to fit into the office culture was challenging. But the work they gave me was easy, further encouraging my lackluster motivation. And no one seemed to care about actually using me for the things they hired me to do. I spent more time on Facebook than I did actually working. Which for some, getting paid 3 million won a month to spend most of your time on Facebook would seem like heaven. But for me, it was horrible because I wasn't getting any valuable work experience. And the company eventually laid me off because they couldn't justify paying me that much when there wasn't a lot of work for me to do.

After that, I looked at who I was as a worker and I felt ashamed. I knew I should have applied myself more. But I didn't and I couldn't go back and change things with my magic time machine. So, in my next job, the one I currently still have, I forced myself to go back to being that thorough, hard-worker. I'm not 100% there yet, but each day is progress.

And I'm not going to lie, there are days when I'm bored with my work. But then, there are days when I am really focused and getting things done. And there are days that are so hectic, that five hours goes by without my noticing (I like those days). Fortunately, getting a job at a company that I enjoy working at and in my career field helped my motivation. Also, a good talk with my boss after six months also helped kick my butt into shape. And I have the opportunity to make myself more valuable by giving suggestions to the anchors and reporters. Officially, I don't have a lot of power, but I am in a position to influence others, should I choose to do so.

So, the moral of the story... I shouldn't teach English. I would love to teach writing or journalism. But yea, me and teaching English, eh, we don't get along so well. Though, I'm sure it would have been a completely different story if I had taught children or had to come up with my own lesson plans...

It's Spring!

And I'm quite happy about that, though incredibly busy...

- Got an article about a new band called "The Finnn" coming out in the May issue of "Groove" magazine. It's not my absolute best work, but I'm still happy with the outcome. They are a fun band and I wish them the best as they navigate the uncertain waters known as the Korean rock industry.

- Still need to meet up with Han Dae-soo for a follow-up interview. I've just been way too busy to do this, but I'm going to try and get it done in the next week or so.

- Should have an interview with Phonebooth for the rock article soon.

- Waiting to hear about Boohwal... still...

- Costco!! I've decided I want to try some Greek recipes during my week off, so I'm planning a trip to Costco tomorrow to pick up the ingredients I can't get at my local market. I also need to suck it up and get an external hard drive. After that and paying the bills this week... It's turning into an expensive week...

- I seriously need to spend some time cleaning the apartment in the next couple of days. The trash needs to be taken out and the kitchen and fridge are an absolute mess (and kind of smelly) since dishes need to be done and food needs to be thrown out. But when you take two very busy girls and put them in the same apartment... these things do happen...

- Work, work and more work. I've been working the last seven days straight. My co-worker's Mom is in town, so I took on two extra days so he could have the whole time off to spend with her. I don't mind, since it means I'll have the next seven days off.

- Radio is different. They moved my day to Tuesday, making that morning very busy, and there is a new host. It was a little awkward this morning when I went it, partially because we didn't know each other and partially because she was sick, but we soldiered on and I think it's going to be a good arrangement.

And I think that's about that. I'm sure there is more to be done. Or at least things I would like to do, such as shopping and getting a new notebook, but I think they'll have to wait until next month...